When it comes to your speed dating dates, you want to spend that short amount of time getting to know that other single as much as possible. As, this will give you the best chance at deciding whether or not that person could be compatible with you.
The problem is, with so little time, how can you find out as much about that single as you can? Well, it all comes down to the questions to ask. Which is why it’s so important that you really think about which questions you’d like to ask before the event – particularly when it’s so easy to get flustered and not know what to say on the night.
So, how do you decide on which questions to ask?
First Off, Here’s What Not to Ask
Before we focus on what you should ask, it’s beneficial to think about the types of questions not to ask. As, the wrong question could easily be the difference between a single choosing to match with you or not.
Avoid Questions that are Too Serious
When you’re trying to find a long-term partner, you’ll likely have a list of life goals that you want that person to be on the same page as you with. For instance, you might want marriage and children soon.
While this might be extremely important to you, asking your speed dating single when they want to get married and have kids is very serious for such a short date. Indeed, it’s more likely to scare them off. So, try to focus on more fun questions that will help you both determine if you have things in common – leave the serious stuff for later dates.
Don’t Make it a Job Interview
Yes, you want to find out about that person but, if you ask lots of short and to the point questions, it will feel more like a job interview. To avoid this, ask more open questions that you can start a conversation. For instance, rather than “what’s your job” ask “what’s your favourite thing about your career”. That way you get to here their job but also find out a little about them too.
What Should You Ask?
Now that we’ve covered what you should avoid asking, it’s time to think about what kinds of questions you would like to ask. So, to get you started, here are some fun, open questions that will help you get to know your date a little better.
What Do You Do on a Sunday Morning?
It might sound like a simple question; however, this can really help you get an idea of your date’s lifestyle choices and whether it could fit in with yours. They might say that they like a lie in on a Sunday as they’ve been out the night before, or it could be that they love to get up early for a workout or meet with friends for brunch.
Whatever their answer, you’ll know if that’s something you could see yourself doing too.
What Would You Cook for Visiting Friends?
For some of us, a dinner party or enjoying food together is one of our favourite things to do. So, if your date suggests four Pot Noodles, they’re probably not the same level of foodie as you. Or it could be that you love that answer and that sounds like a lot of fun to you.
If You Could Morph into Any Person (Dead or Alive) Who Would You Choose?
This type of question can tell you lots about a person. For instance, they might reply about a film director or someone in a band, which will give insight into their interests. Which can easily lead you both into chatting about music, art or history – whatever it is that you both like.
Of course, if they choose someone like Ted Bundy, you can take this a clear reason not to match with them!
Who Was Your First Crush When You Were Younger?
Questions like these are just fun, particularly if you’re both of a similar age. It allows you both to laugh about your past tastes as well as reminiscing about old TV shows or pop stars from that era. Again, opening up the conversation to lead on to other threads of chat.
Do You Have Any Pets?
If you’re an animal lover yourself, getting to know if your date has pets or has had pets in the past will let you know their feelings about animals. They could hate animals or it might be that you adore cats while they prefer big dogs. It might not be a deal breaker for everyone – but knowing your date likes the same animals as you is a great foundation to a new relationship.
What you choose to ask your dates is completely up to you on the night. Just try to not ask the same question to every date, as this can become pretty monotonous and your dates will start to merge into one. Instead, mix up your questions and go with the flow of each date – it could be that they have some interesting questions for you too!
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